Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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