Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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