My friends, they love my intelligence
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
