Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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