Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
he fucked my hip out of place.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
be right there i have to get my cape
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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