I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
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