the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
