did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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