this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
