I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Randomize
