yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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