ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
