Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
