We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
