my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
