I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
