He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Randomize
