Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
