i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
