You're completely useless in the revolution.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
