She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize