I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
