Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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