my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Girls should come with a carfax report
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
