This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
why do cheetos always look like penises
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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