Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
birth control should be required to get into college
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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