# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
