she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize