I just pynch a tree in the face
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
