i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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