We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
