My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
