Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
sex in a hospital.. check
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
