She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize