Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
