we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I need help removing her.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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