He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
