I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
