I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
