Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
