How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
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