I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
