what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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