I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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