Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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