I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
