i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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