New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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