Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
