he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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