yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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